Dating a girl who rejected me
I’ve travelled a lot, my friends all tend to be pretty ambitious, successful, outgoing types. My question is, how can I get him to meet with me again in a low-pressure, relaxed environment so I can let him know genuinely how much I like him? I’m 37, single, and had a really bad breakup 2 years ago. I finally meet this guy at a house party who intrigues me and reminds me of an old college boyfriend: cute, sweet, very shy. But around the 5th date, I start feeling ambivalent about him. (I want to be sure before I go there.) I start wondering if he’s too nice/boring/granola. I was really, really shocked by this as the last time we met he was clearly keen to see me! (But I really wanted to see him again to see how I felt.) After pestering him with texts, he agreed to spend Sunday morning with me to go for a walk on the beach. In which case, I’m better off not dragging things out… I'm really no different than your average 29-year-old male… I've never had a girlfriend; I've never been in a relationship and I've never gone on a date. My friends and family can't understand this because by all accounts, a “good guy.”Now, “good guy” is a pretty loaded term.There are many guys who label themselves “good guys” and are anything but. Many have told me that the women themselves are to blame, but thinking back, I could never really blame them.
If a woman doesn't want to go out with you because she isn't trying to date right now, that's fine.It’s pretty hard to take the sting out of being rejected by a guy after a month or so of semi-serious dating, especially when the signs seemed to be indicating a reasonable likelihood of success.Sadly, I find myself in this situation a little too often, so by now I’ve got a system for dealing with my hurt feelings and bruised ego in the immediate wake of being rejected. Yes, I was stupid to have taken him for granted so early on. Proclaim his love outside your window with a boombox? There’s nothing the nice guy can do to convince you that you were wrong. If he thinks you’re special, he’ll come around on his own. I nearly forgot because it’s childish, and nothing I’d ever recommend – except for the fact that it works like a charm: He can pull away and stop trying to court you. It salvages his self-respect and makes you come crawling. So, to all the people who are reading this who want to learn how to “get your boyfriend back,” the answer is clear: stop trying to get him back.